confident vulnerability
what is confident vulnerability?
it is willingness to let your soul shine unfettered
in the face of uncertainty and solitude despite all the forces
(most of all your own ego)
attempting to build walls and nets and cages and chains.
it is asking “what is the purpose in this?”, and
pushing relentlessly for that which is relevant while casting aside all else.
it is courage to leap across the gap
between a feeling in your gut and the spoken word
so that the two may be in agreement to invite the discomfort of social distance, which signals a chink in the armor of miserably inauthentic customs.
it is faithful opening of a weak point that says
“even here you may strike and yet i will not fall, for my strength
lay not in feigned perfection but in the authentic embrace of being human.”
it is calm at the center of the storm that cannot be touched.
it is fortitude to question everything, to admit defeat, and to try again
while knowing deeply that there is no end and rather that this is the goal in itself.
it is acceptance of responsibility for every choice, with ignorance as no excuse.
it is digging in to every pain to discover the lessons to be learned.
it is rigor to determine with each action if beliefs and words and deeds
form a traceable path, and knowing even though it cannot always be so that
there is purpose in striving.
it is clarity to acknowledge that which is terrifying and
the strength to face it anyway.
it is effort to say “i may not be right, but it is my responsibility
to speak and show what i believe,
for there is no assurance in an idea that is never brought to light.”
it is consistency to lead a life in every detail the way you hope to lead others,
lest you carry the guilt of falsehood.
it is practice of sitting quietly with your own thoughts until they actually make sense only to realize later that something was missing and now you will begin again,
as every time before,
to truly understand the lessons life is inviting you to learn.
it is
fear and faith; openness and strength; confession and acceptance;
defeat and repeat; risk and conviction; loneliness and peace;
an iron in a fire; a tree trimmed; a bird in flight; a river ever flowing.
